These are priceless! |
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De Darrah
Matron Joined: November/10/2007 Location: Sacramento CA Status: Offline Points: 3419 |
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Posted: November/22/2020 at 11:19pm |
1. When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison. 2. To me, "drink responsibly" means don't spill it. 3. Age 60 might be the new 40, but 8:00 pm is the new midnight. 4. It's the start of a brand new day, and I'm off like a herd of turtles. 5. The older I get, the earlier it gets late. 6. When I say, "The other day," I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago. 7. I remember being able to get up without making sound effects. 8. I had my patience tested. I'm negative. 9. Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your containers. 10. If you're sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare straight ahead and say, "Did you bring the money?" 11. When you ask me what I am doing today, and I say "nothing," it does not mean I am free. It means I am doing nothing. 12. I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever. 13. I run like the winded. 14. I hate when a couple argues in public, and I missed the beginning and don't know whose side I'm on. 15. When someone asks what I did over the weekend, I squint and ask, "Why, what did you hear?" 16. When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery? 17. I don't mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really excited. 18. When I ask for directions, please don't use words like "East." 19. Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes. That would be boring. Spend 30 seconds in my head. That'll freak you right out. 20. Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life out of nowhere, makes your heart race, and changes you forever. We call those people cops. 21. My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb. Which is your favorite one? For me #10 and 19. |
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De
Past Matron New Hope Ch. #117 OES PWHP Palm Shrine No.32 now Alchor #27 WSOJ Y.B.Y.S.A.I.A. As Brother Ben F. said "In Wine there is Wisdom In Beer there is Freedom In Water there is Bacteria" < |
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rchadwic
Quarryman Joined: June/04/2011 Location: Palm Bay, FL Status: Offline Points: 254 |
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Again, Thanks, De.... I like 8 and 21. And a Happy Monday to all.
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Bob Chadwick
Palm Bay #397 Palm Bay, Fla |
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Sec'yBob
Quarryman Joined: April/23/2015 Location: Missouri Status: Offline Points: 468 |
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Yes they are priceless, and some of them very true/real.
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Raised 2001
PM Crestwood-Anchor #443 PM Meramec #313 X3 Past DDGM Dist #24 Lodge Education Officer Missouri Lodge of Research O.E.S. Chapter 129 WP X3 Legion of Honor recipient |
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edwmax
Administrator Joined: November/06/2007 Location: Georgia, USA Status: Offline Points: 7098 |
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#15
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"He who would assume to govern others must first learn to govern himself."
Thomasville 369 |
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