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Puns to Groans

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De Darrah View Drop Down
Matron
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Joined: November/10/2007
Location: Sacramento CA
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Points: 2999
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote De Darrah Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Puns to Groans
    Posted: September/07/2016 at 4:51pm

Acupuncture is a jab well done

A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking

Dijon vu - the same mustard as before

Practice safe eating - always use condiments

Shotgun wedding - A case of wife or death

A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy

A hangover is the wrath of grapes

Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion

Reading while sunbathing makes you well red

When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired

What's the definition of a will? It's a dead give away

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana

In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion

If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered

You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it

Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under

Every calendar's days are numbered

A lot of money is tainted -Taint yours and taint mine

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat

He had a photographic memory that was never developed

A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large

Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall

Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis

Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses



Edited by De Darrah - September/07/2016 at 5:12pm
De
Past Matron New Hope Ch. #117 OES
PWHP Palm Shrine No.32 now Alchor #27 WSOJ
Y.B.Y.S.A.I.A.

As Brother Ben F. said
"In Wine there is Wisdom
In Beer there is Freedom
In Water there is Bacteria"
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Sec'yBob View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Sec'yBob Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/10/2016 at 9:35am
I used to go to a massage therapist but I stopped because she rubbed me the wrong way
Raised 2001
PM Crestwood-Anchor #443
PM Meramec #313
Past DDGM
Lodge Education Officer
Missouri Lodge of Research
O.E.S. Chapter 129
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GrimoireA3 View Drop Down
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Location: Boston
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote GrimoireA3 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/13/2016 at 9:16am
Is it true that Lions don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Please Note: I am not a Mason. And also, I am not an anti-Mason!
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