A Good Laugh
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Topic: A Good Laugh
Posted By: De Darrah
Subject: A Good Laugh
Date Posted: February/01/2016 at 9:47am
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A Jewish
grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit
with his wife. "You come
to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big
panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I buzz you in. Come
inside and elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd
Floor. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell.
OK?" "Grandma,
that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?
......... "What ...
You're coming empty handed?"
__________________________________________ Wise
Italian Grandfather An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated ... 38 revolver, so you will always remember me." "But
grandpa, I really don't like guns ... How about you leave me your Rolex watch
instead?" "You
lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna DA business, you gonna have a
beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos.
" "Somma day
you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man.
"Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, 'Times up!'
"? __________________________________________ Irish
blonde... An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland, arrived at the casino. She seemed
a little intoxicated and bet twenty thousand dollars in a single roll of the
dice. She said,
"I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely
nude." With that,
she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue
yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new
clothes!" As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed. "Yes! Yes! I won, I won!" She hugged each of the dealers, picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed. The
dealers stared at each other
dumbfounded. Finally,
one of them asked, "What did she
roll?" The other
answered, "I don't know - I thought you were
watching." MORAL OF
THE STORY Not all
Irish are drunks, not all blondes are dumb,
... But all
men ... Are
men! __________________________________________ Global
Facts About Sex At any given moment: FACT:
79,000,000 people are having sex - right now. FACT: 58,000,000 are kissing. FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex. FACT: 1 old person is reading emails. You
hang in there, sunshine ------------- De Past Matron New Hope Ch. #117 OES PWHP Palm Shrine No.32 now Alchor #27 WSOJ Y.B.Y.S.A.I.A. As Brother Ben F. said "In Wine there is Wisdom In Beer there is Freedom In Water there is Bacteria" < |
Replies:
Posted By: edwmax
Date Posted: February/01/2016 at 10:12am
Your being bad, today. .... ...
------------- "He who would assume to govern others must first learn to govern himself." Thomasville 369 |
Posted By: De Darrah
Date Posted: February/01/2016 at 7:05pm
Yep I are. 
------------- De Past Matron New Hope Ch. #117 OES PWHP Palm Shrine No.32 now Alchor #27 WSOJ Y.B.Y.S.A.I.A. As Brother Ben F. said "In Wine there is Wisdom In Beer there is Freedom In Water there is Bacteria" < |